Shape-Shifting Goat Arrested for Car Theft

goatA goat is currently being held in Kwara State police cells in Nigeria,  accused of car theft. According to the BBC report, a vigilante group captured the goat who they claim is actually a lycanthrope or ‘shape-shifter.’ Lycanthropy has its origins in myth but does have a rare clinical manifestation in some psychotic patients who believe they can transform into animals.

After hearing about General Butt Naked in the last post, one might be tempted to think that supernatural beliefs are the norm on the African continent but before jumping to stereotypes, I would urge caution. Apparently, the gang captured the goat and then immediately went to the media. One is reminded of a certain famous anthropologist who was fed many a yarn by the “natives” coz they thought it was a bit of fun. However, whatever the motive, there is a more worrying concern that the police have lost control over the mob-rule that now terrorizes the society.


Filed under Newspaper, supernatural

8 responses to “Shape-Shifting Goat Arrested for Car Theft

  1. womaninblack

    Let’s not be too hasty. That goat looks like the one I had to perform a citizen’s arrest on a few months ago for throwing its own ordure at passing cars from a motorway bridge. I thought the stern warning I issued would have been enough. I was clearly wrong.
    On another note, I used to be forced to drink goats’ milk by my mother because I had troublesome skin. I attribute my first spell in prison to that damn milk.

  2. brucehood

    Goats are evil… there is no two ways about it.. If you have ever got close up to a goat to look them in the eye, then the hairs stand up on the back of your neck. There is something so wrong about elliptical pupils…… I like mine big and round…. not slitty and cold.

  3. womaninblack

    They have faces that only a mother could love. And if I am to believe the rumours, that kind of thing goes on often amongst goats. A warning to us all of the perils of incest – it may seem convenient, but you’re only a generation away from elliptical pupils and cloven hooves.

  4. hang the goat!i think a damn ol’ goat has stolen my last closing argument…hehehe

  5. Ahh… the cloven-hoofed, horn-ed beast!

    Goats are shifty and disreputable… they’ll jack you up and nick your socks if you stand still near them.

    The only way to subdue a goat is to give it a wine gum. It will be so busy chewing the damn thing, that you can retrieve your socks and steal away into the night.

  6. poietes

    Now hold on. I happen to like kid goats. They are very soft and cut and not one of them nicked my socks and tried to get me to worship the devil or anything like that. I think you all have a bad case of goat prejudice, and even if he did steal the car, I’m sure that it wasn’t a very good car. I mean, he probably just stole an old car because he needed a quick trip to the store for beer or something like that. I don’t think he would have stolen a nice car. I mean look at him. He looks half way stoned anyway. He couldn’ have driven very far.

  7. brucehood

    Oh Ok, Poietes….actually my favourite cheese does come from goats so I guess I shouldn’t dis the goats.
    You’re right, he doesn’t look quite right.. Let me tell you about the Gonad Goat Doctors in a forthcoming blog.

  8. poietes

    Uhm, Gonad goat doctors . . . I can hardly wait . . . I think. Actually, I have a real dislike for goat cheese. Someone convinced me one day at lunch that I would love it, so I ordered this huge salad that was topped with it. They declared that it was just like feta. It was not. I was not a happy camper. I took all of the goat cheese and dumped it on whatever they were eating, which did not happen to be a salad. I’m not gracious when perturbed.

    But I still tink dat de goat drove de car, mon.

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