Welcome to Head Lice Control

When my girls were younger,  I remember the horror of discovering their first infestation of head lice. Despite the reassurances that “lice prefer clean hair” you still feel that a hoard of aliens have taken of the head of your beloved child. After the third or fourth reoccurrence, you resigned yourself to the truth that all kids get them but that some parents were less concerned about treating them. I can understand. You have to shampoo the hair and then comb out the lice and eggs. It was like painting the Forth Road Bridge – an endless task.

One HELCU - yours for £19

Anyway, that could all change. If you go to Wincanton, Somerset (Yet another example of woomongery in my neck of the woods – must be something to do with all the leigh lines we have about here) you arrive at the Maperton Trust which according to their website is Head Lice Control.  We are told that 20 years of research has lead to the development of the HELRU (head lice repelling unit). What is this amazing innovative technology that combats the fiendish pediculosis capitis? Why it’s a £19 badge with a picture of a unicorn on it. Does it work? Sure. Why not check out the testimonial from a school teacher who wrote,

To whom it may concern

I am a primary school teacher who has been troubled with head lice since I began teaching nearly five years ago. I started using the Maperton Trust’s device about four months ago. The lice disappeared within a few weeks and have yet to return despite the fact that the children in my class continue to suffer from them.

Fiona Woods

Or consider the letter from a grandmother

Further to my telephone call to you today re-head lice badge, I enclose a cheque for 3 which you have reserved for me. I got one for my grand-daughter Tanya in January and until begining of April when she unfortunately lost it she hadn’t had any ‘Lice’ but within a few days of losing it my daughter found some again, as she had mixed with children that had them, so we believe the badge does work, and hopefully you may have some requests for more, as 2 of these are for Tanya’s friends.

Thank you,

Yours faithfully,

Mrs. E. Hobbs.

And if that is not enough just check out this brilliant statistical analysis of a twelve week trial based on 28 children.

This swings it for me!

Apparently this evidence has not been enough to satisfy the Advertising Standards Agency who have told the Maperton Trust to remove the claims from their website. What cynics. Anyway if you take the time to explore the Maperton Trust site you can discover all manner of amazing science such as radionics and brain broadcasting. This Trust and all of its groundbreaking work appears to be the brainchild of Gordon who is featured on the site alongside many of his animals at his barn in Wincanton. Here he is with his horse. His cat also features prominently on his site but unlike other country animals, I am sure that none of these have fleas. That’s because they have a picture of a unicorn protecting them.

I really should go into this business!


Filed under In the News, supernatural

21 responses to “Welcome to Head Lice Control

  1. jacarandamimosifolia

    That’s hilarious. You’re right. We should actually do this. We just need a name. Something ‘Trust’ is obviously good. And some cool 3D graphs done on a Mac. Obviously if we could have an office base where some ley lines appear to intersect, so much the better. Product ideas?

  2. Gee – it’s even less convincing than ShooTag. And I thought that was near impossible.

  3. This in the FAQ:

    1. How does it work?

    Without a comprehensive understanding of technology e.g. that used in space travel, it is not really possible to provide a very satisfactory answer.

    That is one of the best things I’ve read all week. It’s the FAQ equivalent of ‘Don’t worry your pretty little head about that! It just works!’

  4. Just been looking at the Maperton site after hearing about the headlice badge on the Skeptics with a K podcast. Mysteriously, the page has been taken down, so I was unable to read about its wonders first hand (oh noes…). Good job we can still see them on the Wayback Machine – http://classic-web.archive.org/web/20080205105754/http://www.mapertontrust.com/headlice/htmlfiles/faqs.htm

    Also, reading about the products on the Non-chemical Healing Products page provided me with a great source of hearty laughter. Some of these bits of kit are over £3k… wonder how many they’ve sold…

    Cheers – Grant

  5. Anonymous

    have been using the badge for a few years now….as long as you remember not to chuck it in the wash,it really works

  6. Kelly

    Used the badge for my son and mysteriously it does work! My husband thought it a ridiculous buy, until he saw the effects.. Can’t explain how it works but I’m not really bothered.. As long as we don’t have to deal with vile lice I’m happy.

  7. brucehood

    Dear Kelly, you must understand why it could not possibly work. It’s not only sympathetic magic but it’s a picture of a unicorn! The reason your son does not have head lice has nothing to do with wearing a badge.
    I note that the website has gone down. I expect they were asked to take it down from Trading Standards Agency.

  8. Debbie

    My daughter has been wearing her badge for almost 2 years and has very long hair, she has not had any lice since. This is the 3rd badge I’ve bought as it only lasts approx 2 years, I replaced when needed as I wasn’t taking any chances. They are impregnated with something that the lice does not like and it definitely works. Don’t know what I will do now! These badges have saved my daughter the discomfort of getting lice and putting chemicals on her head when she got them, which she did many times before. I have lots of friends who also used the badges for their children and have been extremely happy with them!
    Maybe the ASA should go after the companies that claim to cure baldness or cellulite etc, or are they too big to take on!

  9. Debbie

    That’s all very well, but all Mapperton had to do was demonstrate the efficacy of their products and the ASA wouldn’t have had a problem with them. They didn’t, and they were censured accordingly.

    All you are presenting to us are unverifiable anecdotes, just like Mapperton did. The main different being, you’re not selling products that aren’t demonstrated to work in the slightest, with some of them priced in the thousands. I don’t know about you, but I don’t think people who are desperate for cures for various conditions, some of them terminal, should be convinced to part with that sort of money for a product that doesn’t seem to do what it is claimed to do.

    Don’t get me wrong, I’m not accusing you of making stuff up. I am suggesting that the reason for your daughter not picking up any lice isn’t down to the cardboard disc you put in her hair, but that you’ve convinced yourself that it is anyway.

    We see too much of this sort of stuff being bought by people who believe what they are told and then maintain that belief with confirmation bias and wishful thinking. Power Balance anyone?

  10. Mr P Jameson-Hall

    The Unicorn Badge does work as has been proven by My daughter who has worn hers for 6 years with no comebacks and has survived 20+ outbreaks in several cases she was the only child in her class with no nits where as the rest of the class suffered (FACT) the best i can make of this is the corporates disliked The Maperton Trust and have got a bee in there bonnet about 1 person trying to help others out.
    Also as a comparison my son doesnt have a badge but he got Nits and brought them home (Great), meanwhile his sister didnt so as far as im concerned the saying “it does what it says on the tin” is correct this would appear to be a witch hunt on the behalf of the corporates.
    Also i have nothing but praise for Major Gordan Smith as he also helped my son out after he was born with the sickness he presented the medical faculty with he was a very sick little baby but with out a single drug inside him the major helped him a great deal and put him on a road to recovery. Another
    time my wife had a major liver operation where over half her liver was removed and she was expected to be in hospital for two weeks after too recover well after keeping the major informed by phone all through the process from when she went under to coming out she was up on her feet by day two and discharged by day 4 even the Staff couldnt beleive it especially as her op was classed as major so even a dounting thomas like myself has to sometimes admit when things you cant explain work and just accept the facts as they are presented.
    So i think all you Biggots ought to get back inside your little box’s and just let alone.

    • Call me cynical, but I don’t believe a word of it, Mr/Mrs/Miss Jameson-Hall.

      Thanks for your anecdotal non-evidence though. I’m sure it’s convinced some idiot somewhere that asking for reasonable evidence to support claims of efficacy is nothing more than a cunning plot by corporate bigots to destroy the good name of Mapperton.

      Good grief…

  11. Mrs S E Griffiths

    I wanted to buy some badges but could only find this stupid argument going on instead!
    My 13 yr old used them and they were most effective now my 3 younger children have to suffer needlessly
    I really do not care HOW they work they DO
    Could Grant the sceptic please find me 10 people who have used them correctly and still Caught head lice??
    I think you should prove it really dosent work before you start wit you condescending sceptisisim
    It is up to me what I spend my money on, I really don’t need you to ” protect ” me from myself.
    Perhaps you could put some of your misguided effort in to bringing back “nit nurses” in schools instead?
    Mrs G from Gloucestershire

    • Morning Mrs G

      First of all, the onus is on the person making the claim to provide the evidence. The role of the sceptic is to ask questions. That’s what’s happening here, so perhaps you should wind your neck in, instead of taking reasonable enquiry as a personal insult.

      You say that you don’t care why a particular thing works, if it works. I say, is it actually working, or are positive results down to other factors, such as confirmation bias and wishful thinking? That’s where the science comes in and that’s where Mapperton has been singularly lacking.

      If that doesn’t bother you, then that’s your prerogative, but it doesn’t bode well for any reasonable discussion on the matter.

      As for it being up to you what you spend your money on, then that’s certainly the case. A fool and his money is soon parted, as they say.

    • Yeah that’s what I’m talking about baycb-ni-e work!

  12. Janet Fletcher

    I am disappointed to find that I can no longer buy the badges. I used them for my older children with great effect. I did enquire as to how they worked as I was concerned about the effects of possible chemicals or magnetism on my children. Despite reassurances that neither was the case, I wasn’t given any alternative explanation as to how they worked, just a very vague reply. I decided to try them and can only say that my children never again suffered from headlice from when they started to use the badges. Coincidence?? I’ll never know, but I would like to be able to purchase them now for my younger children, certainly seems a better option than the lotions and painstaking combing I have to endure on a regular basis. I appreciate what you are saying but from my experience and that of others, the badges seemed effective. As for other products on offer, I have no experience and so cannot comment.

    • If you’re still amazed by the magically headlice-repelling properties of carboard circles with unicorns printed on them, I’ll get some made up and you can have them at £15 a pop – that’s a £5 discount off what Maperton were asking for them. I can personally guarantee they will have the same effect. Just don’t ask me how they work though, not unless you are familiar with space travel technologies…

  13. shannon

    How do I buy half a dozen of these HELCU badges. Also how long to they last for?

  14. Joanne Smith

    Anyone know if you can still get these badges, I had them for my daughter who always got nits but never got them whilst wearing this badge…. Wanting one for my granddaughter now

What do you think?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s